wisdom – Segal Coaching LLC

Yoga Mantra: Take a Comfortable Seat (In Your Career)

Welcome to a new decade and my first article in a monthly series, Off the Mat: Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career.

Through this new series, I am creating a space in which I can support clients and readers who are interested in and receptive to furthering their yogic wisdom by providing a means to translate yoga principles to their careers.

This month’s mantra is fitting for the New Year and often incorporated into yoga classes during the first few days of the year (and other times): set an intention.

Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career

If you have ever been to a yoga class, you know that you are often invited to “take a comfortable seat.” You can sit on the floor or on a yoga block, bolster or zafu meditation cushion, and you are encouraged to choose the position that is most comfortable for you.

Relatively comfortable, that is. Not “cozy all tucked in your bed” comfortable, but the seat that feels most relaxed but allows you to stay alert at the same time.

Many of us, at least in the West, are not as accustomed to sitting without a chair or couch that has a back to rest on. We have do not have our core muscles sufficiently developed to keep our spine straight and pelvis stabilized. As we learn how to engage those muscles, we might be encouraged to imagine the pelvis like a bowl that can be tilted forward or back. Your goal is to find the right angle for proper alignment – keep the pelvic bowl level so you don’t (by analogy) spill the soup!

Yoga teachers, for example, may remind us to extend our spine from our sacrum to the base of our skull and relax our neck so our heads feel like they are simply floating. The image helps you internalize the ease and space you can create for yourself. A key takeaway is that we create much less stress in our bodies if we are in optimum alignment and can relax whatever muscles are not needed to maintain the pose.

That’s what you’ll learn in a yoga class – if you have the right teacher – and you can also learn similar concepts from a physical therapist, chiropractor or other health professional. The point of the comfortable seat in yoga, of course, is to help you free yourself (mind, body and spirit) for the work that you’ll do while seated in the class and be able to take that with you as you move off the mat.

THE “COMFORTABLE SEAT” OF YOUR CAREER

As I mentioned in my first article in this series, Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career is focused on translating yoga wisdom to our professional lives.

We can take the suggestion to “take a comfortable seat” literally, creating an ergonomic workplace and striving for good posture that allows us to relax and our energy to flow freely up and down our spines. That would be a great extension of the yogic wisdom of the phrase.

Yet the concept of the comfortable seat can also be imagined as moving beyond the literal and into the higher plane of how you align yourself professionally. The idea of relaxing while maintaining alertness – holding both of these goals in your mind simultaneously – is the aspect of the comfortable seat that gives us the richest metaphor applicable to our careers.

If you are getting hung up on the words pelvic bowl and spinal alignment, just imagine a cat. They are the masters of relaxed alertness, as they are able to sink comfortably and entirely into a space – as if they have not an ounce of tension in their bodies – yet be on the ready should their environment change on a moment’s notice.

Rather than arriving at a comfortable posture, many of us tilt (our career, if not our pelvis) too far forward or too far back. On the one end, we push too far into the future or in one direction or another, hurried and dissatisfied with ourselves, our choices, responses from others or the progress we have made in our careers. On the other end, we may fail to be sufficiently forward-looking, resting on our laurels or even feeling overwhelmed defeated and therefore falling back in our (again metaphorical) seats. In either case, we are not using our core strength to keep us balanced, centered and at ease.

When we are not setting ourselves up for ease, we need to devote more of our energies to maintaining our current position and have less energy available to access the opportunities that would present themselves if we were in an optimum state. When we are not alert, we can become complacent and miss those opportunities. The wisdom is to find the balance that brings both of these states together.

How can you achieve the optimum state of relaxed alertness in your career?
What would be different if you did?

Anne Marie Segal is an executive coach, resume writer and author of two well-received books on interviewing and career development. She served as a corporate attorney for 15 years, including roles at White & Case LLP and a prominent hedge and private equity fund manager, before launching her coaching practice. In addition to her career coach and resume writer certifications, she is a certified yoga teacher.

Based in Connecticut not far from New York City, Anne Marie partners with clients internationally on executive presence, impactful communications, graceful transitions and other aspects of professional and personal development.

This article is not medical advice. It is career advice!

Yoga Mantra for January 2020: Set an Intention for the New Year

Welcome to a new decade and my first article in a monthly series, Off the Mat: Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career.

This month’s mantra is fitting for the New Year and often incorporated into yoga classes during the first few days of the year (and other times): set an intention.

Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career

Welcome to a new decade and my first article in a monthly series, Off the Mat: Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career.

WHY I AM WRITING THIS SERIES

When I work with clients, I often incorporate wisdom accessed from my yoga training – I became a certified yoga teacher in 2012 – and ongoing practice.

I am not always explicit about yoga as the source of such wisdom, however, because not everyone finds yoga accessible or personally meaningful to their own lives.

Through this new series, I am creating a space in which I can support clients and readers – among those who are interested in and receptive to furthering their yoga wisdom – by providing a means to translate yoga principles to their careers.

Essentially, in this series I bring yoga to the foreground. Yet these aren’t yoga lessons in the traditional sense. I won’t teach half moon pose, alternate nostril breathing or how to flip your dog. In Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career, we are explicitly taking our yoga off the mat.

How can a (new or existing) yoga practice enlighten your career? How can you integrate what you learn on the mat into your personal or professional life?

This series is my gift to you. In the spirit of yoga, take what serves you and leave the rest.

YOGA MANTRAS

There are traditional yoga mantras straight from the Upanishads, such as Lokah samastah sukinoh bhavantu (translation: may all beings everywhere be happy and free), and more contemporary mantras based on yoga principles.

In Yoga Mantras for the Modern Career, I am building on the idea that every action in our lives can be a meditation and every instruction in a yoga class, however small, can become a mantra.

More specifically, since this site is about leadership, professional development and related areas, the mantras in this series will be in support of your life and career.

THIS MONTH’S YOGA MANTRA:
SETTING AN INTENTION

This month’s mantra is fitting for the New Year and often incorporated into yoga classes during the first few days of the year (and other times): set an intention.

When we set an intention in yoga practice, we do it in present tense, such as:

I live in the present moment.

The goal is not simply to have your intention on the mat (while practicing yoga) but to take it with you as you move off the mat (into the rest of your life). In the context of your personal and professional life, you might set another intention that serves you:

I have a great career.

I speak fluent Spanish.

I live in New York City.

An intention is stated in present tense, even if it is not your current state. By wording it in the present, you can see yourself as if you have already achieved – and thereby activate the power of – your intention.

Once articulated, your vision is transformed into action through:

continuing to bring your awareness back to the intention,
maintaining a commitment to the intention (for yogis, this is the tapas or fiery discipline of the Niyamas),
holding a confident belief you can achieve it, and
taking active steps to realize your intention.

When clients come to me seeking a career change, promotion or new job, for example, we work (explicitly or implicitly) on some or all aspects of the above.

First, I help them clarify, articulate and prioritize their intention.

On a very granular level, what does it mean to you to have a great career? (This is a version of the classic coaching question, “What does success look like for you?”)

What is working in your professional life, what needs to change and what specifically would that change look like?

What are the obvious and not so obvious things that would need to shift?

What would you be doing on a day-to-day level (which type of projects, what type of team or individual work, what working environment, how much oversight, etc.)?

The more you can clarify your intention, the more effectively you can keep it on the front burner and take concrete steps to realize it. You may also find that a more specific career or other intention will not only enable a richer and more robust visualization but also increase your ability to keep your awareness on the intention rather than giving way to the inevitable distractions that each moment presents.

Second, we work on increasing their confidence.

You may have confidence across many aspects of your life, but to achieve your intention you need to have the confidence that you can actually bring it to fruition and maintain that confidence through the process of creating the reality your intention represents.

Third, we devise active, effective steps to realize their intention.

This third aspect works in tandem with the second one, as your confidence will increase as you outline and begin to take active steps to put your intention into action. This may include, for example, moving out of your comfort zone, acquiring new skills or meeting people who can help you realize your goal.

Since the steps to creating a great career may be very specific to your individual case, let’s take a look at the implementation plan for a more universal intention, like foreign language acquisition. If your intention is to be fluent in Spanish, you may decide to take some or all of the following steps:

launch a weekly “Spanish table” lunch group or other gatherings among friends or colleagues,
find and listen to Spanish-language podcasts or songs during your morning commute,
engage in community service that exposes you to native Spanish speakers,
make a list of and watch top or classic movies or TV shows in Spanish (with or without English subtitles), from an Almodovar classic to Roma or even Jane the Virgin (which is partially in Spanish),
hire (or barter English lessons with) a Spanish tutor,
get and use magnets and/or flashcards with words and pictures in Spanish,
keep a diary in Spanish,
read books or magazines in Spanish,
do yoga in Spanish (hint: you can get your perro hacia abajo (down dog) going with a plethora of YouTube videos for every range of fitness level and special interest), and/or
prepare for and take one or more trips to Spain or Latin America during the year.

The overarching theme is to come at the same intention from a variety of perspectives – in this case, to create an immersion in the Spanish language – which is the same advice I would give for your career or any other aspect of your life.

Remember that part of the wisdom of putting your intention in the present tense is to recognize that you may not need to start from scratch or make a 180-degree turn to realize your goal. If your intention is to have a great career, you may start with recognizing what is already “great” about the current state of your professional life. Do you hold a leadership role? Have a great team? Relish the intellectual challenge? Make a lasting contribution to a cause you support?

If your intention is to be fluent in Spanish, build on what you already do and cherish in your life. So if you are an avid cook, you can start to follow recipes from cookbooks written in Spanish or talk yourself through the steps of your cooking in Spanish and explore any words you are missing. For example, in the phrase “ahora, voy a poner el agua a hervir….” if you don’t know the word for boil (hervir) or always forget that water (agua) uses the article “el” rather than “la,” you can remember both in the context of the sentence.

Although I spend a lot of time above giving examples of steps to illustrate the importance of putting your intention into action, the execution process is not more important than the setting of the intention in the first place. (It simply has more steps, as an intention by its nature is short and sweet.)

You can have the best implementation plan in the world, but if you don’t keep your intention alive and continue to bring your awareness back to it, outlining the steps will get you nowhere. We will meet here again month after month, New Year after New Year, and you will ask me why you have not (sufficiently) progressed. I am certain that is not what you seek!

Instead, post your intention at the top of your mat or on your bathroom mirror – literally, with a sticker or sticky note – and return to it every day.

MY OWN INTENTION FOR 2020

My own intention for the New Year is the first one written above:

I live in the present moment.

Carter at the Beach for New Year's

At Compo Beach for New Year's

Yesterday, on January 1, I took my dog (Carter) to Compo Beach for the first time. It was windy and cold but lovely nonetheless. Carter was ecstatic, and I had lot of fun keeping pace as he raced and frolicked across the beach.

Today is a new day and another chance to reset or refine my intention.

Happy New Year! What’s your intention?

My Biggest Career Mistake: Sailing, Secretaries and Lime Green Pants

I believe in the power of mistakes.

No one likes to make mistakes, of course. But that is where the learning happens. Bigger mistake, greater opportunity to learn.

What may have been my biggest career mistake happened very early on, while I was still finishing my undergraduate degree. I had my very first internship and was ready to conquer the world. Good so far. I also thought I knew exactly how to do it. Ha!

I was a lowly intern, feeling on top of the world that I had gotten “in” at a place that I very much wanted to work. The secretary in the department was very good to me, trying to help me out so I could make my way. But I didn’t take the cue.

Not only did I not yet understand that secretaries rule the roost (if not the world), but I did not appreciate that someone could make choices very different than mine and still have a lot to teach me.

Here’s the thing. This secretary (we’ll call her Nancy) wore lime green capri pants, corduroys and other outfits to work that in my naivety had judged as “not fit for the professional world”. I call myself naive not because I was wrong to recognize that Nancy would not move up the corporate ladder if she didn’t emulate the look of those at the top: dark-colored suits. She wouldn’t. Rather, I assumed that moving up within the organization was and should be Nancy and everyone else’s goal, without realizing that she had her own plan. One that was more carefully formulated than my 19-year-old point of view would allow.

Nancy wanted a place to work during the day (while she pursued her own interests on the side) that was forgiving enough so she could wear want she wanted and be whom she pleased. She was expected to conform to certain norms and left blissfully free to ignore other ones. She made calculated decisions to achieve the results she wanted. She knew exactly how to get where she wanted to go, but it wasn’t anywhere that I could have imagined.

So when Nancy pulled me aside one day to tell me that I should “follow the lead” of the head of the group (we’ll call him Troy), who wanted to talk about basketball and sailing a good part of the time, I ignored her advice. I wanted to ask Troy about things that interested me, and at the time these were not at the top of my list. While others joked and called him Captain Troy, I smiled through gritted teeth and pushed on for the certain set of experiences that I had expected out of the internship.

After all, we were not on a yacht, we were in an office. I wanted to learn the ways of leadership and success, and they were not going to come from talking about sailing, I thought. At the time, I didn’t have a boat, or any family or friends with a boat. The one time I had taken an extended trip on a boat as a child, I had been seasick most of the week. I was bound to say something ill-informed, so wasn’t it better to steer the conversation back to what was comfortable to me?

I couldn’t look bad if I just avoided topics that were out of my league, right? Anyway, I reasoned, what did Nancy know, with her green pants and all? How could a chat about sailing be useful to me at all, other than to smile and humor my boss? Why would I encourage him to continue that conversation?

Turns out, Nancy knew a lot. In particular, she knew how to keep everyone happy while keeping herself happy. She kept these two goals in perfect balance, giving Troy and the group the support they needed while feeding her own needs. She intuitively understood that showing an interest in sailing was showing an interest in Troy. And that was the important part.

By contrast, I was being immature, overly serious and even selfish – holding on to the world as I knew it – by expecting to direct the line of conversation. And I was missing out on the chance to learn, bond, grow and have fun.

So, my biggest career mistake was actually a set of related mistakes:

Mistake #1: Discounting the message of an unexpected messenger.

Mistake #2: Closing myself off from new experiences.

Mistake #3: Making it all about me.

As I found out later, the green pants were a statement on Nancy’s part, a line in the sand that she was in a bridge job and had no pretense of “moving up” to a management position within that organization. She had her eyes on another prize – her own set of professional goals – but she also made sure to be so good at her job (orienting herself to the situation, as needed) that there was no way she would risk losing it over something as simple as wardrobe choices. In fact, as a highly creative person, she literally wore her authenticity on her sleeve. And she was respected for that by others in the group, including (in the months and years following my internship) by me.

I often think back to Nancy, the unexpected messenger, with whom I have lost touch in the over 20 years since I had that internship. I am indebted to her wisdom. I wonder if she has started her own company, maybe even a fashion line.

Nancy could have changed her style of dress any day. Changing my attitude took a lot longer.

From my biggest mistake, I learned my greatest lesson. It is not all about fitting in, it is also about being a fit.

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: