Master the Interview: University of Chicago Webinar

I was honored to speak to University of Chicago alumni last month about highlights from my recent book, Master the Interview: A Guide for Working Professionals.

If you are currently in the job search, looking opportunistically or willing to move for the right role, you will save yourself hours in your interview preparation – mitigating stress and uncertainty in the process and increasing your chance of a job offer – through the discussions in this webinar.

I was honored to speak to University of Chicago alumni last month about highlights from my recent book, Master the Interview: A Guide for Working Professionals.

If you are currently in the job search, looking opportunistically or willing to move for the right role, you will save yourself hours in your interview preparation – mitigating stress and uncertainty in the process and increasing your chance of a job offer – by watching and listening to the discussions in this webinar.

Here are two of the many points I make that will help “frame” your preparation:

  1. You are “on interview” well before you enter the actual interview room. It behooves you to take an expanded view of interviewing, from the initial contact with companies and networking (including social media) to your follow-up efforts thereafter.
  2. While you cannot anticipate every question that will be asked in an interview, you can have examples ready that align with your value proposition and are versatile enough to be responsive to a range of questions. Thinking about questions thematically will help you organize and bring more impact to your potential responses.

For the slides to follow along to the presentation (or speed up the learning process), please click here.

Anne Marie Segal is a career and leadership development coach, author, resume strategist and member of Forbes Coaches Council. She is founder of Segal Coaching, author of Master the Interview: A Guide for Working Professionals (available on Amazon.com) and a frequent public speaker in New York, Connecticut and beyond. 

Interview with Daniel Arking of UChicago’s Resume Exchange

Here’s a link to my recent interview with Dan Arking about my new book, Master the Interview: A Guide for Working Professionals.

Through my work as an Advisor to the The Resume Exchange, a career development resource for University of Chicago students and alumni, I met Daniel Arking, its tireless Founder and chief Advisor.

Here’s a link to my recent interview with Dan about my new book, Master the Interview: A Guide for Working Professionals.

Click here for the link to the Resume Exchange Interview

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Six Key Value-Proposition Questions to Understand Your Personal ROI

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Think beyond your current experience.

Have you ever defined your highest “value proposition” – both to your current company and in general? It is not always a simple thing to do.

Another way to think about value propositions is to borrow a concept from the investing world. What is your personal ROI? What return on an employer’s investment do you bring? If your total compensation is $50,000, $100,000 or $500,000 a year (plus benefits), for example, is the employer’s investment worth it, and why?

Think beyond your current ROI. Focus not only on the experience you bring and what you have done in the past, but also the greater value you can offer.

We often let our job titles and duties lead our thoughts about our professional net worth, but our true value add to a company is not best expressed by what department we are in or what tasks we have completed. We need to think beyond that and take a look at what problems we solve, what we have accomplished and how we do the job differently (and better) than anyone else who could have held the same role.

Key value-proposition questions include:

1)  How does my role fit into the organization’s big picture?

2) If I left my role tomorrow, what gaps would need to be filled?

3) What have I accomplished in the last 6, 12 and 24 months?

4) Where do I consistently receive positive feedback? Is the feedback meaningful to help me define my unique strengths and talents?

5) What basic needs of my employer do I meet? Providing vision, generating profit, supporting growth, managing risk or something else altogether? Be specific as to needs and how you meet them.

6) Where do I want to move next professionally and how can it benefit me and my current/future employer?

Beyond our current companies, we need to ask how our roles over time fit into our long-term vision for our careers, including our values, talents, strengths, interests, competencies and risk tolerances. Many of us lead careers that we have not fully examined, and therefore miss finding meaning in our careers, which leads to dissatisfaction and ultimately does not let us reach our potential. Defining your value proposition in this larger context helps you understand yourself and your role(s) better, so that not only do you find a better fit, but you are better able to communicate your worth.

This larger definition of value proposition takes more time than most of us are willing to invest, which is why those who do invest that time and energy have a distinct advantage. As you think about your career, what has made you stand out in each of your various roles? Can you tie these together or do you notice a trend?

Takeaway question: are you passionate about the things for which you are known, and if not, how can you become known for the things you are passionate about? 

Even if you are not passionate about all aspects of your job, you can tailor it to bring the role closer to what you do find challenging, interesting and meaningful.

Anne Marie Segal is a career coach and résumé writer for attorneys, executives and entrepreneurs. She is currently completing her first book, on job interviews, which will be available in early 2017.

This post was originally published on LinkedIn.

© 2016 Anne Marie Segal. All rights reserved. Image from Shutterstock.
 

Successful Career Transition, Stage 2: Vet Your Options

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Kristina has always secretly dreamed of owning a vineyard in France.

She has other dreams, too. But this one just won’t go away.

How can Kristina, from her windowless desk at a bank in New York City, figure out how to bring more of her dream life into her actual life?

Exploration is the first stage of a successful career transition, as I covered in my prior post. Stage 2 is a decision-making process that involves vetting the ideas that have been uncovered through brainstorming, research, informational interviews, networking and other means of discovery. We vet against a set of factors that we have enumerated, such as our values, talents, interests, skills, financial needs and the market.

These two first stages (exploration and vetting) work in tandem but are distinct. In fact, we do them naturally every day, but not always intentionally.  More importantly, too often we rush to judgment about our ideas without fully opening ourselves to the brainstorming process, missing valuable information about ourselves and our true career goals as we try to vet while still exploring ideas. Often this rush is triggered by our own anxiety about transition, while at times it is the expediency of the situation.

In the best case scenario, we will explore and vet in a cycle, which will look a lot like the following image. We explore ideas, we vet them, and then we explore again. In other words, each time we make an interim decision about career transition that has not led us to a final conclusion, we go back to the proverbial drawing board with an open mind, returning to further vetting until we make a final decision (about one or more options to pursue in our career transition).

Here is what this might look like.

Exploration - Vetting

As we covered in the prior post, there are three aspects of the brainstorming phase:

Creative Mindset – Facts – Exploration

Kristina can generate ideas about her vineyard dream, conduct actual research into what it takes to own a vineyard and explore her questions with people who are already in her dream space.

As a coach, one of the points I would try to tease out from Kristina is what exactly appeals to her about this dream. Some of the appeal may be one or more of the following:

  • Living on the land; more in-tune with the seasons
  • Being involved with the wine community
  • Making money while drinking wine! 🙂
  • Doing something completely different than her current job – i.e., curing burnout
  • Feeling relaxed, the way she feels on vacation
  • Owning her own business; being her own boss
  • Living in France; speaking French
  • Feeling as though she has made an impact on the world
  • Leading a team of people committed to a quality product

For your own dream job, I would encourage you to do the same brainstorming about what exactly is appealing about that dream. Think through what is missing in your life that this dream job would offer. Imagine what you would be doing every day and how that would support your values and vision of yourself.

Notice that we haven’t yet vetted anything. We don’t know if Kristina has the money it takes to buy a vineyard (or could get financing), the talents to do it, the stomach for the risks or the true interest in doing the day-to-day work of running a vineyard. We also don’t know if she would be any good at it – would she be able to sell any wine? There are a hundred questions she would need to answer before actually moving forward, and each of those questions (and their answers) may open more ideas to explore as well as offer good feedback to Kristina about how a successful career transition would look.

The reason for separating exploration and vetting is that we often try to make decisions with too little information. Kristina will not know why this particular dream keeps coming up if she does not explore it, without the shoulds getting in the way. (You know the shoulds, I am sure. She should be practical. She should stop wasting time with something that will never happen…. And the rest of their should cousins.)

As part of her exploration, Kristina can explore vineyards from Long Island to Provence and beyond. She can talk to people in the business. She can sign up for Alliance Francaise, if her French is a little rusty. If she feels ambitious and tentatively committed to see if this could go anywhere  – or just for fun, to give it a whirl – she can create a business plan for the vineyard. In other words, Kristina can bring her dream world a bit more into her real world and recall the sensation of being carried away by an idea. 

In summary, the openness and creativity resulting from Kristina’s indulgence of her dream job idea may at some point lead to the actual result of opening her own vineyard – if it passes the vetting process – or it may throw off side ideas that are a better fit.

If you are ready to move to Stage 2, here are the main points to vet:

Values – Talents – Interests – Skills – Needs – The Market

Like Kristina, once you have some ideas on the table and have done your initial exploration with an open mind (whether these ideas represent dream jobs or simply “a bit better than what I have now” jobs), you are ready to subject these ideas to the vetting process. As an overview, here are some questions to ask yourself:

  • Your Values: Will the targeted role be meaningful to you? Will it meet your top values or will there by any values that need to be compromised (or left unmet) in this role?
  • Your Talents: Does it play to your strengths, and will it best utilize your greatest talents?

To insert an example here, in Kristina’s case, does she understand the how to market wine (or could she learn it) and would she enjoy doing that? What about how to run a farm? Run a business? Manage people? Manage cash flow?

What other talents will she need, and which of these play to her strengths?

  • Your Interests: Will the role be challenging and interesting on a daily basis? Are the problems that arise ones that you enjoy solving?
  • Your Skills: Do you have what is needed for the targeted role and if not, how can you acquire those skills? What commitment is needed to close the gap?
  • Your Needs: Will the role serve your financial needs? Will it meet other needs, such as the need for autonomy, the need to feel part of a team or the need to be recognized for good work?
  • Your Temperament: Will the minor annoyances in this job one day become major ones? Are you well suited to the day-to-day aspects of the role?
  • The Market: Does the marketplace need what you would like to do? How many of this type of role is available at the level that will meet your financial needs? Note: If it is a new idea or a niche market, you may need to conduct market research to know the answer to this point – don’t assume that just because you build it (and love it yourself), they will come.

Through thoughtful exploration and careful vetting – which is not all work, it can be fun too! – you will find new ways to frame and “reframe” your ideas and decisions about career transition. Whether you are looking to make a major change like the one above or if you simply want to tweak your current role, putting structure and organization around the process helps you make better decisions. You also may, as part of the process, find a “bridge job” that will help you incorporate into your life some aspects that are missing, as you continue to explore and vet your longer vision for your career.

For example, say that Kristina decides that she does want to go for it and open a vineyard in France – not an immutable decision, but a concrete goal – and that she has or can find the means to do so. She may first move from her bank job in New York to a similar role in Paris – admittedly also a move that takes effort – as a way to get geographically closer to her goal, meet more people who can make it a reality and satisfy a number of points on her dream list that appeal to her. Alternatively, she may seek a role at a vineyard (or a service provider to vineyards) in some capacity that is closer to her current role and uses her current skills, learning the business as she goes.

Remember: neither is not a compromise, either is a bridge. As she takes smaller risks and gets closer to the life she desires, Kristina will increase her resilience, self-awareness and capacity for change. 

Hungry (or thirsty) for change? What will your next move be? 

Anne Marie Segal is a career coach and résumé writer for attorneys, executives and entrepreneurs. She helps clients with career exploration and other stages of the job search process. For more information, please visit her website at www.segalcoaching.com.

 

© 2016 Anne Marie Segal. All rights reserved.

First image above: Shutterstock.

Successful Career Transition, Stage 1: Start With a Creative Mindset

Marilyn hates her job. She has many ideas about where her next move and needs help sorting them out. Rob is stuck in a rut but he can hardly imagine doing anything else. Marilyn and Rob are in Stage 1 of the Career Transition Process and need to put some structure around their exploratory work.

 

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Marilyn hates her job. She has many ideas about where she would like to land next and needs help sorting them out.

Rob is stuck in a rut. He has spent so long at the same role that he can hardly imagine doing anything else. He wants to identify new possibilities and opportunities.

Jamie likes what she is doing and would like to stay in the same field, but she wants to find a way to advance within her company or, if necessary, outside of it. She is also open to changing to a new job altogether, if it does not require starting over.

Each of these career-transition questions inhabit Stage 1 of the Career Transition Process.

The Marilyns, Robs and Jamies of the world crave structure around their exploratory work. Otherwise, they live in their own heads, and they fail to make much real progress that will help them out of their current situations and into a better place. I know, because I was there myself once. I also know because I see it every day in my coaching practice.

  • Stage 1: Explore: Are you open to and ready for change at this time? What options are available? How and where can you explore further? Who can help?

A successful career transition begins with creative brainstorming, targeted research and empirical exploration.

Creative Mindset and Brainstorming

Having a creative mindset allows you to generate ideas and be open to a range of possibilities. Brainstorming isn’t about vetting, that comes later.

Stage 1 is the “what if” stage.

  • What if you changed industries, practice areas or careers?
  • What if you stayed in your current role? How could you improve it?
  • What if you decided to go for CEO, another C-level role or partnership?
  • What if you gave up one of those roles to pursue something new?
  • What if you took a risk and …?

Research

While keeping an open mind, research facilitates brainstorming. I often suggest that clients search job descriptions (not to apply, as background material), and read through what they describe as the basic components of the job. Along with job descriptions, they can often pull up resumes of individuals who are already working in similar jobs from a simple internet search. These resumes can give key insights into what actually goes into a particular job, which may be much different than the job seeker had imagined before such research was conducted.

In addition, job seekers in the First Stage of their job search can research:

(1) industries, fields and companies,

(2) what skills they would need to acquire to achieve certain roles, and what that skill acquisition would entail,

(3) compensation in the desired field, and

(4) information about analogous roles that would help them widen their net of possible roles that could be a fit for their talents, skills and interests.

Remember: If you have gone through job descriptions in the past with a feeling of dread, kick that feeling to the curb. These words on a page have no hold over you. You are simply brainstorming to help yourself get on the right path.

Exploration

In addition to analytical research, the third means to open your mind to the possibilities in your job search is to meet and spend time with individuals in your target fields.

“Hi Pam, it’s Marilyn. Confidentially, I am considering a career move that would put me in a role similar to yours. Would you have some time to meet me for coffee near your office sometime next week? I would like to ask you a few questions so I can better understand what your day-to-day workload is like before I make the leap.”

Take time to network and conduct what are called informational interviews (as opposed to job interviews – you are asking for information, not a job) as you continue to generate ideas and ask people what they know, and who else they may know, to help you explore possibilities.

It is worth noting that you should choose your networking contacts carefully at this fragile Stage 1 of your job search. The proverbial Debbie Downer (who sees everything negatively) will not be helpful for you as you are trying to keep an open mind. Keep Debbie for the vetting process, which is Stage 2 and will be covered in my next post.


Anne Marie Segal is a career coach and résumé writer for attorneys, executives and entrepreneurs. She helps clients with career exploration and other stages of the job search process. For more information, please visit her website at www.segalcoaching.com.

© 2016 Anne Marie Segal. All rights reserved.

Image above: Shutterstock.

Nine LinkedIn Strategies: Which One Matches Your Goals?

LinkedIn® is a lightening rod, charging up diverse opinions about the best way to approach it. At one end of the spectrum, you hear that being on LinkedIn is a waste of time or, worse yet, only for those who wish to commoditize themselves. For many others, LinkedIn is the best thing to happen to online networking, a free space to invite the world to hire you, connect with you, buy from you, etc.

I suggest you start with the end in mind: what do you want LinkedIn to do for you? Once you know your target, you can devise the best strategy to get there.

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Eyes (and darts) on the target. Shutterstock image.

LinkedIn® is a lightening rod, charging up diverse opinions about the best way to approach it. At one end of the spectrum, you hear that being on LinkedIn is a waste of time or, worse yet, only for those who wish to commoditize themselves. For many others, LinkedIn is the best thing to happen to online networking, a free space to invite the world to hire you, connect with you, buy from you, etc.

I will not say that the truth lies somewhere in between, as I don’t think LinkedIn (like anything else) lends itself well to one-size-fits-all. Rather, when I teach groups or individuals about LinkedIn, I suggest you start with the end in mind: what do you want LinkedIn to do for you? Once you know your target, you can devise the best strategy to get there.

Here are nine basic LinkedIn strategies. Which one works best for you?

1) No Profile. The No Profile approach is favored by a range of individuals, from those who wish to signal they are too elite for LinkedIn to those who conduct business exclusively offline, whether by choice or association. If your professional strategy is to maintain a low online profile and let your reputation and in-person dealings speak for themselves, then LinkedIn may fail the cost-benefit analysis. If this strategy appeals well to your target audience (be it family offices or firemen) and doesn’t lead to a number of missed opportunities, then it is probably the best choice for you.

2) Stealth. Those who have a Stealth profile want to be able to search for others without revealing anything (or very little) about themselves. They are similar to the No Profilers, except that they want access to LinkedIn’s goods without making an offer in return. Like the No Profilers, the Stealth strategy is helpful if you believe that you have nothing to gain, and only something to lose, by putting your talents “out there” into the marketplace so that someone may discover you. Note that the Stealth Profile is often similar to the Just Getting Started Profile, which is not a strategy at all, just someone who has not bothered to understand or master LinkedIn. (Also note: beware Stealth connectors, who may be looking to hack into your network.)

3) Minimalist. A Minimalist profile, if done intentionally, also conveys that someone has “better things to do with their time” than be on LinkedIn. In some cases, this strategy is effective. However, like the profiles above, it probably will not generate interest (or new opportunities) among LinkedIn’s reported 100 million users. That said, having a Minimalist profile does allow you the benefits of building a network among your close connections. It also may be useful to have a minimal presence if your company actively restricts what you can post or obviously frowns on LinkedIn, as it does allow people to search specifically for your profile and find you (if they know what they are looking for). For those in finance or information technology, for example, a Minimalist approach is sometimes the only way to enjoy some of the benefits of the LinkedIn service without risking account or policy breaches.

4) Basic Professional. The straight-shooting Basic Professional LinkedIn profile includes a bit more information than the Minimalist profile, such as a professional picture, descriptions for some or all jobs, and possibly a summary. It may also include some keywords (i.e., important nouns that can match up to online searches by hiring managers and recruiters), and it has enough information to actually allow the reader/viewer to understand who you are and what you do professionally. It often does not give personal details (that could create a connection), and generally there is little or no creativity in the text or enhancement beyond completing the basic profile fields. Often, it is written in the third person.

The Basic Professional profile is most effective if your strategy is to use LinkedIn for “verification” purposes – giving the reader/viewer comfort that your profile matches the information they already have about you – rather than to generate leads through LinkedIn. It will not be sufficient to propel you to the top of LinkedIn search results (when someone is searching for an individual with your background and talents), so if that is your end game, you should consider a more robust strategy. That said, for certain individuals who want to maintain some distance with the public, as a matter of personal branding or due to the nature of their work, a Basic Professional profile may strike the right balance.

5) Inviting. The strategically Inviting profile can be a variation of the Basic Professional, or it may be more creative and “loose” in its presentation. Inviting profiles often incorporate keywords but are also geared toward making a connection. To that end, an Inviting profile, which is often written in first person, is written with a “human voice” to be appealing and develop a bond or kinship with the viewer/reader. Most job seekers and entrepreneurs benefit from Inviting profiles, especially if they are Active (see below), and thought leaders use them to their advantage as well.

Inviting profiles are in some ways what LinkedIn is all about. They say more than a résumé format ever could, and they encourage people to connect with you because they highlight your talents, accomplishments, interests and goals as an individual. In addition, they can facilitate an interview or other professional conversation (whether for networking, business-generation or employment), because you have already made a good first impression and answered some of the basic questions, including your value proposition, with your Inviting profile.

6) Highly Creative. A Highly Creative profile is similar to an Inviting profile, although rather than putting down a welcome mat for all, it goes all purple shag carpet to say, “Look, I’m different. I am on LinkedIn, but my way.” This strategy works best if you are the one to call when someone is looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack (rewritten, of course, without the cliché.) Like the earlier profiles on this list, the Highly Creative profile generally works best when your reputation precedes you, although the link can be included in marketing materials and”worked” that way, and keywords can be gently massaged into the message to increase the likelihood your profile is found by the right audience. Needless to say, this profile works best for those who are solidly ensconced in a creative field, where innovation is prized. It does not go over so well in banking.

7) Active. I include Active as a separate profile strategy, although it often piggybacks on one of the strategies above. An Active LinkedIn profile is one that includes all of the basic elements of LinkedIn (picture, summary, recommendations, keywords, skills, etc.), which are points that LinkedIn’s algorithm uses to “score” how high up you appear in any given search results. In addition, LinkedIn rewards its users (again, as far as search visibility) for being active within LinkedIn, such as participating in groups, sharing, posting and interacting with others’ posts.

A note about Active profiles: It is often hard to start up an Active profile without triggering a concern that you may suddenly be in the midst of a job search. Being at least minimally active on LinkedIn before you need it is part of the Active strategy.

8) Transition. A very light touch is needed for a Transition profile. The trick is to continue to appeal to one’s current audience without tipping your hand about a possible change, while adding enough keywords and information to your profile to hook and appear credible to your new audience as well.

A subset of the Transition profile is an analogous strategy that is often overlooked. Another goal of a Transition profile may be to use LinkedIn not to find a job at a new company but to highlight your talents within your current company – i.e., get promoted or make a lateral move – so that CEOs and others with whom you are connected can see not only what you offer to your current position but also what you will bring to the company in the new role. In many ways, LinkedIn is the perfect platform to reinforce your goal to have your talents recognized, because it is unlikely (unless asked) that you will be sticking your résumé under the nose of senior management. To be effective in this strategy, you need to highlight aptitude rather than simply focusing on what you have done.

9) Straddler. Like Career Changers, Straddlers target more than one audience, but a Straddler has one role he/she wishes to keep and another one to add. For example, a lawyer may also be a budding fiction writer or aspiring corporate board member, wishing to highlight both sets of talents and appeal to both networks. Rather than creating entirely separate profiles – which can be time-consuming and confusing – a Straddle profile is created by weighing the relative merits and costs of each element added to maximize the benefits of a combined profile while minimizing the risks that any key target audience might not find this approach appealing or effective. A Straddler must very carefully evaluate whether the “second part” of a profile enhances the Straddlers credibility for his/her main target roles or detracts from it. Each audience will respond to different aspects of your profile, and the trick is to highlight the relevant parts without appearing disjointed. 

Unless you want to approach LinkedIn haphazardly, each of the above types of profiles represents a choice of how you wish to present yourself and what return you are seeking from LinkedIn. Whatever strategy you choose from the above, it behooves you to approach LinkedIn with your goal in your sights rather than simply writing about yourself and posting it to the world. As with anything in life, if you know your target, you are more likely to hit your target.

Originally published on LinkedIn Pulse at: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/nine-linkedin-strategies-which-suits-you-best-segal-jd-ccmc-cprw

Young Women & Interpersonal Cues: Missing Them Can Undermine Your Career Advancement

By bowing out, she had taken a backseat, undermining herself. Julie had made a decision, perhaps unconsciously, that she was not an important member of our makeshift meeting. As a result of her stepping away at a critical point in the conversation, Julie gave away her power.

At my office recently, I was approached by someone in the hallway I had never met, a fellow tenant (let’s call him George) with a business complimentary to mine. In a few minutes, it became clear George wanted to sell me on something, an idea more than a product or service. He talked excitedly in a loud voice, as he got himself pumped up on a concept that was close to his heart – a local monthly networking group he leads that he wanted me to join. I mentioned that I knew someone from George’s office, a young woman who worked for him (let’s call her Julie), whom George called out to join us. Julie popped out into the hallway a minute later to say hello, as we continued our conversation.

Suddenly, the floor receptionist (let’s call her Clara) appeared. Clara beckoned Julie to come over and answer a question, oblivious to the fact that three people standing in the hallway deep in conversation could be a “meeting” that was just as momentous as a sit-down affair. It did not appear that Clara wanted to talk about anything important, just a routine matter, and I expected Julie to wave her off with a promise to catch up shortly.

And then a very odd thing happened. Something that I had almost forgotten young women can get wrong and how damaging it can be to their careers.

What happened is this: Julie left the conversation. Like the receptionist Clara, who had no skin in the game, Julie missed the cues. She did not grasp that this spontaneous 15-minute meeting in the hallway was important to George, that it’s the way he does business. George was very obviously giving me his elevator pitch, growing his base of support and relying on Julie to help him carry it to a close. And Julie missed the ball. Completely.

The fact was not lost on George, as he made very clear a moment later. “Julie, where are you going?” he asked, as Julie and Clara stood in the hallway, five feet from us, whispering back and forth in their own private conversation. I expected again for Julie to wave Clara off, reading the cues from George, or at least to try to do so, but again she did not.

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“Clara has a question for me,” Julie said flatly, turning her back on us and continuing the conversation. She did not excuse herself by mentioning anything about the relative importance of Clara’s question, that there was an emergency, that she would be “just 30 seconds” or anything to mitigate her allowing a seemingly unnecessary break in the flow of conversation. George continued to speak with me, although he was visibly annoyed by Julie’s absence, turning to glance at her out of the corner of his eye until she finally returned.

As the observer of this interchange, I wished I could communicate to Julie what I had witnessed from a third-party perspective. By bowing out, she had taken a backseat, undermining herself. Julie had made a decision, perhaps unconsciously, that she was not an important member of our makeshift meeting. She was not part of the sales conversation, she “happened” to be there, and could just as easily have been somewhere else without affecting the outcome. This is an error, in fact, because Julie was the link between George and me, as I had only just met George in the hallway and had known Julie for months. If I were to be persuaded to “buy” what George was offering, she certainly could have tipped the balance.

As a result of her stepping away at a critical point in the conversation, Julie gave away her power, allowing herself to deal with minor administrative tasks while a potentially profitable referral relationship was being made (or lost). Or, if there indeed was a pressing need to speak with Clara at that moment, Julie had not communicated that fact in a clear manner so that George (1) felt confident to rely on Julie’s judgment call to leave the meeting, and (2) had maintained focus on his train of thought and momentum, rather than being distracted from his intent. Julie’s actions subtly communicated the opposite: that she felt George did not need her. The key problem is that if George hears this message too many times at critical points in Julie’s career – he doesn’t need her – then, in fact, he won’t.

Have you witnessed a situation like the one I describe with Julie? As women, we want to be recognized as powerful, strong partners in the business world. There are unseen obstacles to our success, and we are denied opportunities based on our gender. And sometimes, we give the power away ourselves. We need to read, and give, helpful interpersonal cues. When we value our own worth and prioritize the more meaningful contributions we can make, we increase our engagement and opportunities in our careers. 

Originally published on LinkedIn Pulse as “How Young Women Can Undermine Themselves in the Business World by Missing Interpersonal Cues.”